Hope for Single Moms, Dads and Grandparents Raising Children Alone

Hope for Single Moms, Dads and Grandparents Raising Children AloneI am receiving many emails from desperate single moms trying to keep their sanity while rearing their children and making a living at the same time. This has become a gargantuan nightmare for many young women, men, middle aged women, and grandmas, who for many reasons, some beyond their understanding, have ended with the sole responsibility of caring for young children and teens.

Most people living in America today have no clue as to the scope and depth of this widespread phenomenon right here in the United States. So many of the younger single moms are overloaded with responsibilities, increasing debt, some with no jobs, and with the task of training their children and providing for all their needs.

This generation is producing an alarming and escalating number of unprepared single moms and dads who desperately need help, encouragement and training. Most marriages begin happy with a pie-in-the-sky attitude that all is going to be well. But it’s not too long before the pie comes crashing down. Too many young couples marry for the wrong reasons and too many never receive training about marriage and parenting. Children come along and in more than half of all broken marriages, children take the rap for the disintegration of the marriage, when in reality, it is the parents lack of knowledge and training that produce the chaos.

I am becoming more aware of the plight of so many single moms and the growing number of single dads through the stories I hear from a close friend who works as an administrator at a public school and the emails I’ve been getting from single moms after the release of my book, “Satan, you can’t have m children.”  Discipline problems and attention disorders are very prevalent.  Children from broken homes may experience trauma from the separation and in many cases from the abusive situations that led up to the breakup.  There is also another group of single moms who never married but have children from a partner who never made the commitment to be a husband and father.  The numbers of single parents joining the ranks keep growing every day.  A smaller group has well adjusted children but the breakup is causing worry and anxiety that spills over into all their other relationships.

What is becoming of so many of these children and their single mom or dad?  Many children have to learn to fend for themselves by staying home alone after school and preparing their own food, much of which is frozen and microwaved.  No time for real bonding, sitting around the table, or discussing important things.  Television, Facebook, and video games have become the Nanny and caregiver of too many children.  What are the consequences: knowledge of violence, disobedience, anger, and disrespect.  Parents take the child’s disruptive behavior personal and try to punish the child by administering restrictions, screaming, yelling and making empty promises of the consequences that will follow the repeated offenses.

In reality, children of broken homes are the victims of different kinds of mental and physical abuse.  Their behavior is modeled by the caregiver.  Whatever is permitted and allowed from the day a child is born, will become a habit and a lifestyle.  Sadly, some young mother’s are also victims in the hands of an abusive mate who has taken her for granted and sown seeds of disrespect, fear, and anger into a child’s heart, leaving her destitute and having to cope with the results of his behavior.  Every case is different, but lately, too many cases have the same roots and the same results – broken single parents and broken children.  We need to help this generation of parents and children.

My counsel:  Please read my book, Satan, you can’t have my children, and apply many of the principles and prayers that will help you come out of despair and give you hope and a plan.  This is not a commercial to sell my book.  I believe in the message that God has given me for parents and caregivers.  I know what it feels like living in a divided dysfunctional home.  Don’t wait until things get impossible.  Spiritual guidance and a good prayer partner, will be necessary to begin the process of restoration.  If you are desperate, you will find help.  Get into a good Spirit-filled church and seek out a mature and stable Christian couple or woman who will pray for you and give you sound counsel.  If you need guidance finding a church, send me an email letting me know the area you live in.

May God give you the strength and wisdom to overcome the difficult situations in your life.

Copyright by Dr. Iris Delgado

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